In a crisis

my dad is still not talking properly to me , so I'am in deep panic inside . I know that when I'am in stress I comfort eat so I'am taking measures in place to stop that. Its annoying its like when I was in college walking it was when I stopped for one second and it was like some one screamed in my head.

Maybe its a sign that , all the panic is building up inside . Talking with some one is impossible since one . they don't know me , two . my parents are not good with talking like my dad motto is 'your crazy, or what?' so when he says things like that its not reassuring.

I feel right now that I'am in a complete loss , its like I'am for what next?

what gonna happen next ?

I'am in love with man that can never be fully mine , and next year I'am going to university . Him and I are scared about it since university and things involving it can lead to me maybe moving out or I spending less time with him.

when I imagining being away from him my heart aches with despair , its like I'am in extreme turmoil. Me and him have been in love for a long time , so its not puppy love , its a deep love that can cut and make you feel pain sometimes. Like right now , not knowing where to move next or just lost.